If PattyCakes Shurmur used Twitter....

[King of Kings]

I would hope it would look like the following fake Twitter I just found that is epically funny. See for yourself....

ItsNotPat It'sNotPatShurmur



Reason I didn't use TOs: Heckert said no TO to me on Gameplan Weds. Thought he meant don't use TOs, just found out he meant Terrell Owens.

22 hours ago

ItsNotPat It'sNotPatShurmur



I was mean during my presser today. #NoMoreMrNiceGuy

22 hours ago

ItsNotPat It'sNotPatShurmur @



@technivore We will work our fannies off, actually not really that is just what I tell the media.

7 Nov

ItsNotPat It'sNotPatShurmur



@BullandFox Hey did you guys know I am putting in a new system? It will be fully installed by 2019. Just battle through with me.

7 Nov

ItsNotPat It'sNotPatShurmur



Tell Kylie and Booms I was looking at Colt's smokin hot MILF Mom in the stands when Colt was yelling at me.

7 Nov

ItsNotPat It'sNotPatShurmur



I am putting that on my sheet now " @theDBbook Last 2 weeks your 1st play called was fumble. Do that 1 again, 3rd time's the charm"

6 Nov

ItsNotPat It'sNotPatShurmur



I can't wait to redeem all my Time Outs for a really cool White Cleveland Browns fannie pack at the end of the season. #Pays2Save

6 Nov

ItsNotPat It'sNotPatShurmur



I didn't block Brooks Reed on purpose, I became infatuated with his beautiful golden locks on film. #Dreamy

6 Nov

ItsNotPat It'sNotPatShurmur



Worst coaching performance since I coached last week.

5 Nov

ItsNotPat It'sNotPatShurmur



@BullandFox My new name will be Predictable Pat

4 Nov

ItsNotPat It'sNotPatShurmur



Please @Frank10TV show the Bengals game Sunday, all of Cleveland hates me. I still have a few fans in Columbus.

2 Nov

ItsNotPat It'sNotPatShurmur



@WillBurge We woke up today after Halloween and we had a guy in the building in a WR costume then realized we actually drafted him.

1 Nov

ItsNotPat It'sNotPatShurmur



Haley looks cool with that beard. Browns fans if I grow a beard, will you like me then?

31 Oct

ItsNotPat It'sNotPatShurmur



Eating my lunch is a Process

31 Oct

ItsNotPat It'sNotPatShurmur



@bullandfox Can you ask Tom why he always takes my parking spot in the morning.

26 Oct

ItsNotPat It'sNotPatShurmur



Not only did Baltimore steal our team in 95 they stole my offense in this first half.

24 Oct

ItsNotPat It'sNotPatShurmur @



@Not_Goldhammer Good points, by the way can I borrow a few bucks from your dad, Uncle Mike took my allowance this week.

24 Oct

ItsNotPat It'sNotPatShurmur



I told the team see you on Wednesday but I told @PeytonsBiceps I would see him in a Patriots jersey next year. #Wedontgetalong

24 Oct

ItsNotPat It'sNotPatShurmur



@BullandFox Loved my fellow coach and rival Mike Tomlin in The Program

24 Oct

ItsNotPat It'sNotPatShurmur @



@RuiterWrong Don't question me Ruiter or you will be banned from the cafeteria for a week

24 Oct

ItsNotPat It'sNotPatShurmur @



@ABAOSTO Just got done watching the broadcast, why does that Jim Mora guy hate me and my team? Is he jealous that I am Mike's guy now?

24 Oct

ItsNotPat It'sNotPatShurmur



Correct RT @TonyMazur Peyton Hillis is out for today's game, but that doesn't matter as Pat Shurmur wouldn't have played him anyway.

23 Oct

tsNotPat It'sNotPatShurmur @


@IRRELEVANT4LI4E Offer denied, I am the coach of this team....I think

23 Oct


ItsNotPat It'sNotPatShurmur @



@IRRELEVANT4LI4E I will run this team the way I oops I mean the way Fat Gram says.

22 Oct

ItsNotPat It'sNotPatShurmur



I used to but I might get an OC job there after Mike bolts out of Cleveland RT @IRRELEVANT4LI4E who else hates notre dame

22 Oct

ItsNotPat It'sNotPatShurmur @



@TonyMazur I will be #occupyingthesidelines. Look for me: I will be the deer in headlights with the quivering lip.

22 Oct

ItsNotPat It'sNotPatShurmur



It was my understanding that I got upset today at practice, but Uncle Mike did say I was great.

21 Oct

TonyMazur Tony Mazur



Here is the question: Do you think Mike Holmgren even cares about the fans?

20 Oct

ItsNotPat It'sNotPatShurmur @



@TonyMazur My understanding is he does care about the Seattle fans.

20 Oct

ItsNotPat It'sNotPatShurmur



@BullandFox I like when people say we don't have enough talent to win, give me 5 years and I will get us to 8-8. Don't worry I am your man.

19 Oct

ItsNotPat It'sNotPatShurmur @



@TonyMazur Tell Chuck to leave me alone. He is hurting my feelings.

19 Oct

ItsNotPat It'sNotPatShurmur



@FakeMangenius How is ESPN going do you think I could get a job there too?

19 Oct

Twitter

[Riffer X]

One thing about Browns fans is we have a sense of humor. What choice do we have?

[Neo]

We woke up today after Halloween and we had a guy in the building in a WR costume then realized we actually drafted him.

[Flugel]

You had me at PattyCakes. That's pretty freakin funny right there.

[Enigmatic Evil]

There's some real great tweets in there lmao. Man I can't wait for 2019!

I used to but I might get an OC job there after Mike bolts out of Cleveland RT @IRRELEVANT4LI4E who else hates notre dame

Tell Kylie and Booms I was looking at Colt's smokin hot MILF Mom in the stands when Colt was yelling at me.

@BullandFox Hey did you guys know I am putting in a new system? It will be fully installed by 2019. Just battle through with me.

[OzDawg]

when the QB yells at the coach AND gets caught on tv doing so.... wouldn't surprise me he's benched next game.