Getting started on the 2011 QB Class...

[King of Kings]

Well folks, we best start scouting them now. Out of our current crop we have a 35 year old, an ebony midget and our 3rd string is a guy who can't throw a football whatsoever. I mean bad. I mean really bad. So bad 5 yard screens hit the dirt. Brings new meaning to football....

That said, let's get started.

#1: Jake Locker. This ones the consensus number one overall pick in 2010. He can flat out ball. I tried finding some youtube clips of his passing so we can scout him, but no luck. Found a ton of him running though. If you wanna see a whiteboy run like Deebo from Friday is chasing his lily white ass with a muthafuckin' stiffy hit me up. The kid can run like a motherfucker, no joke. Plus he reportedly has a howitzer for an arm.

#2: Ryan Mallet. For now anyways. I'll toss us up some clips soon. The kid has a rocket arm. We're talking R-O-C-K-E-T. Apollo 13 type stuff. I heard NASA is interested in checking that shit out. Rumor from a cheerleader who'se fucking a kid on the wrestling team whose sister gave a blowjob to the cornerback is Mallet can launch a 100 yard bomb. Definitely interested.

#3: Andrew Luck. Horseballs. HORSE-BALLS people. Another rocket arm. Dude launches balls like a canon launches a canonball. BOOM! I'll get some vids off of him in youtube and see what the experts say about him soon. Same with Mallet.

#4: Christian Ponder. He has a nice ass. He also throws a gorgeous ball and has a perfect tan. Err, uhh, his arms kinda weak. I've watched a bit of his plays(alot, actually) and he seems to max out at about 40 yards from what i've seen. Not good. You're not gonna make it in the NFL if you can only pass 40 yards downfield, let's face facts here you gotta get 60-80 yards downfield a majority of the time.


For right now those are the first round projected QB's. I'd include others but if you're not a first round QB you probably suck. Plus we suck so you put two and two together we gotta draft a 1st round QB next year and we'll probably have to trade back into the first for a wide receiver. Or we'll hafta draft Julio Jones early in the first then trade back down for whichever QB is left. In part two I will include some official scouting tape of each Quarterback, if I can remember how to embed youtube videos. Stay tuned....

[King of Kings]

Jake Locker:





Ryan Mallet:




Andrew Dice Luck:




Christian Ponder:

[TheBestPlayersPlay]

This post is going to cause a flame fest more than likely, but I gather that's what you're going for.

I chuckled a few times. My answer is none of the above. At best we'll be drafting in the middle of the first round and likely it will be a DL, or a stud LB. Maybe a WR depending on how it all plays out this season.

[Riffer X]

I'm a Locker guy, I just think he will have some developing to do. He reminds me of a rich man's Kafka, a guy who grew from a runner to a passer.

Not sure he made the right decision coming back though, he would have went fairly high this year.

[King of Kings]

Originally Posted by TheBestPlayersPlay

This post is going to cause a flame fest more than likely, but I gather that's what you're going for.

I chuckled a few times. My answer is none of the above. At best we'll be drafting in the middle of the first round and likely it will be a DL, or a stud LB. Maybe a WR depending on how it all plays out this season.

Not at all. I was reading what the experts have to say and Holmgren/Heckert screwed the pooch, BUT I think they will make it up next draft. So far we have three canonarmed QB's to possibly choose from in the first(chances are we'll pick #1 overall, we don't have a 1st round QB to singlehandedly get us wins and frankly, all it takes is a QB to win) so i'd really love to get started right now. Thanks to youtube we have incredible access to scouting tape(the same quality NFL teams use, btw) and can figure out which Horseballs best fits the Browns.

I'm torn between Mallett and Locker The Rocker at the moment. I really like Mallet, he looks All-American with a tremendous arm. But Locker is pretty buff with some nice thick arms, he can throw like Peyton, run like Tomlinson all while looking like a Greek God. It's a tough decision right now, so I gotta get started early....

You don't like anyone outa next years crop at all?

[Shep]

Not a huge Mallett fan. He reminds me of DA too much.

Luck has the bloodlines, intelligence, size, and athleticism, but we'll see how he does when a lot more is asked of him. He's good.

Locker has scary upside... like Elway upside. He grew into Sark's pro style really well, but now he has to prove he can be great, not just surprisingly good.

I don't do flame wars. Don't have to. But I loves me a good debate. The sad part is that most of the guys who could hold up their end have drifted away because of the nastiness.

KoK does crotchety pretty well. I'll give him that.

All four will go into the draft with rankings about 64 slots ahead of Freckles.

[King of Kings]

Originally Posted by Riffer X

I'm a Locker guy, I just think he will have some developing to do. He reminds me of a rich man's Kafka, a guy who grew from a runner to a passer.

Not sure he made the right decision coming back though, he would have went fairly high this year.

He'll go number one overall in 2011. There's no way he beat out Jimmy Fucknuts this year. None whatsoever and the Rams were reaching for a 3rd round QB with their #1 overall.

[Crow]

Originally Posted by King of Kings

#4: Christian Ponder. He has a nice ass.

Sphincter control is a very important part of the throwing motion.

[Shep]

Originally Posted by King of Kings

He'll go number one overall in 2011. There's no way he beat out Jimmy Fucknuts this year. None whatsoever and the Rams were reaching for a 3rd round QB with their #1 overall.

So if I ask you to please consider making sense and contributing some worthwhile debate... would you just say you'll talk how you wanna talk?

Yikes. Ladies and gentlemen, we have ourselves our next official board tool. Masters had a breakdown, Veg got reasonable... and into the void steps a raging KoK. Aptly named.

[King of Kings]

Originally Posted by Crow

Sphincter control is a very important part of the throwing motion.

Have you SEEN that ass? It's like two firm cantelopes back there! The question is is it just the colloege uniform or not? NFL pants fit a bit differently ya know.

[Shep]

Speaking of ass...

McShay has Luck going number one overall. Kiper says it's "etched in stone" that Locker goes first.

[King of Kings]

Hey Sheppers, you and your friends say the word, i'll take my ass and everything that's apparently shoved up it to somewhere else.